The Mom's Manager Calendar
I like it. But, it's a little misleading. What I need is a personal assistant, not a manager. I am the manager. But, this is Mom's Manager, so, I'll take it.
I was bored yesterday, because really, what is there for me to do when it snows 3 inches in Kentucky? I watched the snow plow clear our road twice. The kids went sledding. I made hot chocolate. Yes, all of that for 3 inches of snow. We're not even in the country. We live 2 miles from a major interstate, which takes us to downtown Cincinnati in another 3 miles. We're a bunch of weenies.
So, I was bored. I should mention it was 1:00am. There was no sledding or hot chocolate making going on at 1:00am. Christmas Break has gotten the best of me. I stay up late watching bad reruns and sleep in the next morning. Apparently, I cannot manage my own schedule...so, this is probably where the Mom's Manager is going to help me.
Again, I was bored. I can't post on Facebook every 20 minutes like I did after I had surgery this summer. Not unless I want another intervention from all my friends who are tired of updates about what the kids were doing...every 20 minutes. And, videos of them singing. Or still shots of Lego men fighting tornadoes. That percocet makes you do some crazy things! So, I started flipping through instruction booklets from Christmas presents. A sheet of stickers fell out of the Mom's Manager calendar.
Oh wow. This is interesting.
I realize these are just supplemental stickers and you can write in your own stuff, but let's look at these babies.
Four vacation days. That seems about right in my life. Wait...even on vacation I am not really on vacation. Hmmmm. So maybe this means I should be allotted four vacation days all to myself? Now, that's a different story!
Holy crap....I'm about to pee myself looking at this one. Volunteer. There are two stickers. I'm going to have to tell them about this at the next PTA meeting. Sorry gals, I've already done my two days! Good luck to you! I would probably need an escort when I leave that meeting room.
Hey, wait a second. There are three "Nights Out" and three "Party" stickers...now, they don't say birthday party, so I'm going to make that an adult party. So, I get six fun nights. Also, there are two sleepover stickers. I'm going to make those sleepovers at someone else's house. Nice...I'm up to eight nights to myself! Well, maybe I'll let husband in on this...or not.
Ew...two "Field Trip" stickers. I'd rather skip those. It takes a long time for your ears to stop ringing when you get off a bus full of 9 year olds. Unless that means field trip for me. Field trips are things that don't happen that often and are special events. They must mean a field trip to the spa. When was the last time I've been to one of those?
Do I have to combine my field trips with a vacation day or night out? Who do I call in Human Resources to ask about this? And, while I'm talking to HR, I should file a complain about that lady who's worn her pajamas to work the past two days. Oh, wait, that's me. Hey, it snowed 3 inches! I had no reason to change!
Maybe I really do need a manager. Or another intervention. Or quite possibly a percocet. All this snow is getting to me.
Note: When this post went live, the author had finally showered and put on real clothes.
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