My Life Stinks

My life stinks.  Literally.  There's a funky smell around here.  In my car, in the boy's room, in my kitchen sink.  I try so hard to smell good.  I use Bath and Body works.  I do the whole layering thing.  Use shower gel, then lotion.  I like perfume.  I use candles and tarts.  Open windows.  Bleach.  But, the stink is taking over.  It reminds me of my brother's room when we were kids.  He had lizards, turtles, gerbils, rats...yes RATS.  They were soft and furry but they still had those long, nasty, ratty tails.  They were still rats.  My grandma had a white rat when she was a kid....until she dropped a dresser drawer on it by accident.  But, I digress.

The stink.  What to do?  Well, let's start with the van.  I drive it every day.  I'm sick of the stink.  Doesn't a clean car make you feel good?  A really clean car reminds me of a first date.  Or prom.  You know a guy has a date when you see him with a bottle of ArmorAll in one hand and a vacuum in the other.  Throw in a cinnamon scented air freshener and you are good to go!  But, ArmorAll, a vacuum and some little Christmas tree shaped piece of cardboard is not going to help my van.  I need a chisel and a pressure washer. 

The front seats don't look too bad.  Just your average dusting of dirt and some pine needles.  As I venture to the middle seats, still not so dirty.  There are some crumbs, a lollipop stick, a couple of smarties and a crumpled up piece of paper. 

The back seats are where all Hell breaks loose. 

I need a face mask to go back there.  I suddenly feel very guilty for all the times my poor mother-in-law has wedged herself between the boys' car seats.  Because, here is what the seat between their seats looks like....

Those are yogurt covered raisins.  They are wet.  Don't ask me why.  Who knows what goes on back there.  Some of the yogurt is ground into the seat.  There are also chicken nugget crumbs, a ranch dressing container (that has gotten knocked over and smeared into the seat), various fast food containers, Lego pieces, lollipop sticks, and some unidentified candy.

Check out the cup holder.  G R O S S.  That green lump is a melted ear plug leftover from the pool this summer.  It's October. 

No wonder it stinks in here.  And, I haven't even looked under the seats yet!

After washing the outside, I vacuumed and wiped down every sticky surface on the inside.  I thought I did a pretty good job.  But, when the Second Grader got in it, he informed me it smelled like a fart.....luckily, his brother giggled and said "That's because I just did!!" 

Oh, boys....

After you clean your car, don't forget to enter the Disney on Ice family four-pack ticket giveaway!  The contest ends next Wednesday and there are several ways to enter.  Good luck!

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